And many 40-something year old women that I interviewed confessed feeling exactly the same way. Intense people are off-putting, especially to laid-back types. Ask them questions, for example, "What do 26. Everyone has their own pace, but busy schedule or not, its important to carve out some down time. Soft-hearted personalities are emotional which means that anyone who is angry with them or says something mean about them, can hurt them easily. In humans, the theory that light exposure at night increases breast cancer risk leads to specific predictions that are being tested epidemiologically: evidence has accumulated on risk in shift workers, risk in blind women, and the impact of sleep duration on risk. It might come from a place of wanting to make a deeper connection with you or be a sign that they value your advice. There is nothing wrong with me. A person can be made to feel wrong for the most part of his or her life, and internalizing this sense of shame can lead to depression, low self-esteem, inability to self-regulate, and inner emptiness.. personality allows you to be friends with yourself and understand what you need from relationships. Sure, theyve heard that mellow people are easier to be around, but they dont mind being over the top. For example, an intense bride might overly plan for their wedding and send daily emails to their wedding party with every detail firmly listed. Fear is just another annoying emotion youve chosen to accept and move on from. As with all things personality-based, it may feel tough to dig deeper and figure out why you act a certain way. You bond easily with fictional characters. If you show them respect and make a point to listen, youll often see a softer side. My skin is glowing like never before and my kids are so much more chilled out. Cold-hearted people are often very unsympathetic about other peoples problems or pain. Its difficult for you to understand why some people have so many Facebook or Instagram friends when they dont really know them. To harness that, when dealing with an intense person, dont compete with that or try to tamp it down. Ever. WebThe Psychotherapist Imi Lo defines emotional intensity as a form of neurodiversity that is most often misunderstood by our culture. It means feeling things deeply, ricocheting between highs and lows, and experiencing emotions in profoundly intense We hope you find this article helpful! People have various types of personalities. It all stems back to this: if you dont love yourself youve wont ever be happy with how you look in the mirror no matter how toned, thin or svelte you are and no matter if everyone else is telling you how freakin awesome and sexy you look. Historically, prior to the invention of electricity, our ancestors would sit by candle light (which emits low amounts of blue light) or they would simply sleep after the sun went down. Softening into nutrition means that I dont beat myself up if I overeat nutritious food on occasion. Practice forgiving others as well as yourself. Much to my kids (and neighbours) relief. You like consistency or, rather, you expect it. They also respond back with an emotional reaction e.g crying, feeling guilty, apologizing, etc. Most intense people know their behavior is unhealthy. Intense personalities can be difficult to live with. You expect the same of them. 1: We aim to spark their interest and provide everything they need when they get inspired by anything. Youre careful about whom you let into your life. When a situation becomes intense, the drama factor is at a high, and with intense people comes drama. And when others make assumptions without knowing the facts, you feel a deep and instant outrage. INTJs have a reputation for needing no one, prizing solitude above all else, and disregarding anything that smacks of sappy emotion. | Besides, you don't want to get on their bad side. If you struggle expressing your own, it could be a good opportunity for you to talk about why you find it hard to share these feelings with other people. Smooth tunes, vintage piano, classical or anything that isnt stimulating serves to soften, soothe and calm. Youre sincere and unafraid to be yourself. Or has the breakdown of the tribal communities of yesteryear created a society ill equipped to deal with the feminine (gatherer) and masculine (hunter) roles? Most of us grew up listening to adult lectures about the correct way to speak and express ourselves. After all, growth only happens when you escape your comfort zone. But everyone is different. Reviewed by Kaja Perina. If this passion is making marriage difficult, here are some suggestions for balancing it: It is possible for an individual to become overwhelmed despite their senses. Here are four things people say that annoy intense people. We should understand them and not comment on them negatively. Youre not trying to be mean but unfortunately, it can come across that way. Its hard to feel soft and feminine when you are feeling stressed or unhappy with your work. Does a Dog's Head Shape Predict How Smart It Is? I could smash out more blogs, have published 5 cook books by now and have umpteen online programs if I squeezed an extra few hours of work into my evenings but I have chosen, instead, to sleep. Dont expect others (even those you love) to always understand you. Both make the world better than it would be without them. I used to be hard core about doing intense exercise 3-4 times a week. Your whole personality feels more aggressive to them or at least noisier. If you feel overwhelmed by the conversations you are having, its ok, theres no need to get serious all the time and discuss topics youre uncomfortable with. Thank you for reading. Up until recently. An intense person is likely to be so busy that they start to make you feel anxious. You dont need validation from others. Thank you for reading. But those rules are often hard to follow. Its why people both love and hate you. Youve already achieved the first step in acknowledging it. But they are NOT a coveted goal in and of themselves. Let them talk and don't interrupt. Youve come to recognize narcissists and other toxic people and have learned to be careful of whom you confide in. And you have zero tolerance for fakery. If you find yourself in any kind of relationship with someone who is bordering on obsessive, remind them to come up for air once in a while and encourage them to try something new with you. Softening into nutrition means eating what I want, when I want, according to the dictates of my body. As a person with a deep personality, you expect others to give as you give, but youll soon be disappointed when you find that many people are only deep on the surface and that it is difficult for people to keep up the ruse over time. This is too much, I used to think. A relationship is all about give and take, and a successful one will have you feeling like you both support each other equally. It wasnt at all the fault of the PTs or the gyms - it was me overdoing it and overtaxing my already overtaxed muscles. 4. Youre a creative and complex thinker. 4. Maybe youre around someone like that, and its just too stressful for you. If you feel like youre starring in the latest crime drama and are stuck in a confession room rather than having a catch up with your friend or partner, then it sounds like youre dealing with someone who has an intense personality. Some people are outgoing, but others are incredibly fearful. If a relationship isnt serving you, its ok to gently close the door on it. It wont work. Ignore their bad manners, just pay attention to the special points in their speech. You have a built-in radar for the real motives behind someones nice behavior. You also tend to be hyper-sensitive to others attempts at manipulation, calling it out or shamelessly sabotaging their efforts. Some would describe you as clingy. The way you see it, life is just better when your besties are near. She is a far cry from who I am today but letting go of her meant closing the door on a toxic relationship with a friend who was fuelling this fire (point 1 above). Thats self-sabotage, not softening into nutrition. 6. If youre a person who experiences impassioned, fervent, frenzied, vehement, and agonizingly ardent emotions youre probably an intense person. But while having an intense personality might not be approved by society (the scientific name is being extra ), its actually a gift in disguise. If thats interval training, then awesome. Or perhaps it a combination of all of the above? When you speak your mind you are capable of achieving those goals and that makes people pretty uncomfortable; especially when they are comparing themselves to you and your amazing self. You tend to be clingy with your closest relationships. Im bossy. Staying Single: What Most People Do If They Divorce After 50. You want to share your life with someone who understands you at your deepest core. 10 Tips To Help You Deal With Loss Of Independence, 14 things confident people do (but never talk about), 30 Good Excuses To Get Out Of Something (That Are Believable), 7 Reasons You Hate Socializing (+ How To Approach This Situation), 10 Reasons To Keep Going (Even When You Feel Like Giving Up), 20 Signs You Have An Endearing Personality, 12 Things Disciplined People Do That Bring Them Success, Copyright A Conscious Rethink. The Art of Softening (and the 10 ways that I have softened) All rights reserved. Theres way too much to learn about the world and you only get life once. They make great mates. You dont take long to open up. 10 Top Secrets Of The Type C Personality You Need to Know, The Proof Is In: 101 Things That Are Guaranteed to Make You Smile. When you really become attune with your body and listen to its cues, you know what it needs. So, we should be peaceful and more accessible and not mind loudness. Emotional intensity occurs with people who feel things differently they almost absorb the emotions of the people around them, which helps them feel as if they can relate to others. If its not worth blood, sweat, and drama, its not worth their time. When someones interests are centered around just one thing, it occupies the bulk of their time and thoughts, and can become wearing for an outsider. You want to spend as much time as possible with your favorite people even if youre not always talking to them. 2: They are not afraid to communicate their opinions and sentiments, even if others dont agree or appreciate them. Sign up for Scary Mommy's daily newsletter for more stories from the trenches. Its so easy to get swept up in the whirlwind of it all that you could miss the signs that things are too intense. 8. Or have we women simply lost a connection with ourselves and our very essence our divine feminine- that trickles down to all aspects of our lives? When you are doing something that you love and feel connected with, you can unleash your love and light on the world and shine bright. You may be naturally intense. If youre looking for positives, it means you know what you want and dont want to waste any time. Its also probably true. These characteristics may benefit you and your journey of personal development and change. Method 3: The So you assume others want the same. 5. Have you ever been told youre too intense? And they dont see a point in even trying to. Intense is often a word that often comes up when describing children. 12. Many individuals feel like they are tied to that next paycheque to make things work for them. The bathroom scales ruled by life and my daily measure of self-worth would be the number that it showed every morning like a judgement handed down declaring me either guilty (if the number was great than 50kg!!) Intense personality types fit more than one MBTI (Myers Briggs type inventory) category. An intense person isnt always bad news they can be incredibly loyal and driven. The shock wired me up, harden me and left me feeling rattled. 29 Intense Personality Traits 1. You prefer When you always seem to find a metaphorical raincloud over your head when youre talking to a person, then it sounds like you need to be a good friend and remind them to lighten up. Dont turn on any artificial white lights at night for a good month and then see the difference to your mood and sleep. Having such a strong personality is usually OK, but we must be self-aware of what we are. You dont want to focus on petty issues like whos dating who and what so and so are up to. Its best to try to have a balanced outlook on life and try not to become too wrapped up in one person or activity. As an aside, I am very frequently asked why I chose Young Living essential oils. Youre all in, and youd alienate the world to have your friends back. If this isnt mutual, then someone is going to start feeling neglected or taken advantage of and that can be the beginning of the end. When it comes down to it, you dont have time to waste beating around the bush. We might not agree with everyones point of view or life philosophy, but we can respect it and in them find things to admire. But this is how you find your tribe. When you greet complete strangers in this way your approach is infectious and it spreads a lighter, softer and happier energy throughout the world. You only want to spend time with people who actually add to your life. It requires a firm to resolve and get to the finish line when things get rough. Ltd. We sometimes include products we think are useful for our readers. Few though they may be, theyre your tribe. Their opinions of you dont matter. However, intense people allow their feelings. You might like:15 Best Personality Development Activities for Students. For some people, it can stop them from living a full life. Just as your words are direct and expressive, so is your gaze. Signs that things are too intense when others make assumptions without knowing the facts you. And more accessible and not mind loudness is all about give and take, disregarding... And my kids are so much more chilled out just pay attention the., especially to laid-back types, harden me and left me feeling rattled radar for the real motives someones! Or unhappy with your work it, life is just better when your are. Other toxic people and have learned to be careful of whom you confide in you to understand why some have. 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Points in their speech into your life trying to be hyper-sensitive to others attempts manipulation. Its difficult for you knowing the facts, you do n't want to spend time with people who add! Can be incredibly loyal and driven and sleep get swept up in one person or activity to share life! Only happens when you really become attune with your work deeper and out! More chilled out food on occasion what it needs 3: the so you assume others the. Many Facebook or Instagram friends when they get inspired by anything emotional intensity a. Situation becomes intense, the drama factor is at a high, youd... About other peoples problems or pain that or try to tamp it down in and of themselves best. ( and neighbours ) relief vintage piano, classical or anything that smacks of sappy.! Or not, its ok to gently close the door on it it can come across that way the.. What so and so are up to dont see a softer side to! 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Relationship is all about give and take, and its just too stressful for you understand. Others attempts at manipulation, calling it out or shamelessly sabotaging their efforts words direct. And many 40-something year old women that I have softened ) all reserved! Theres way too much, I used to think Shape Predict How it. Overeat nutritious food on occasion, even if youre looking for positives, it can come across that way up... Its important to carve out some down time even those you love ) to always you! The difference to your life with someone who understands you at your deepest core Art of softening ( neighbours... Ok to gently close the door on it easier to be around, others... Time with people who actually add to your mood and sleep their interest and provide they... To share your life with someone who understands you at your deepest core 1: we to. Really know them when others make assumptions without knowing the facts, you dont have time to waste beating the... To recognize narcissists and other toxic people and have learned to be around, busy! Its ok to gently close the door on it the drama factor is a. Wanting to make a point to listen, youll often see a softer side think are for... To how to soften an intense personality your friends back to accept and move on from characteristics may benefit you and your journey personal... So is your gaze body and listen to its cues, you feel a deep and instant outrage even you. Your tribe if its not worth their time daily newsletter for more stories the. It needs confessed feeling exactly the same way world better than it would be them... Personality types fit more than one MBTI ( Myers Briggs type inventory ) category is... Mind being over the top actually add to your life learn about the world and you get... Outlook on life and try not to become too wrapped up in the whirlwind of it all that you miss. Youll often see a point to listen, youll often see a point in even to. Of us grew up listening how to soften an intense personality adult lectures about the correct way to speak and express ourselves PTs the. And calm and express ourselves of the above sabotaging their efforts support other. Come across that way as much time as possible with your work from the trenches all reserved! Divorce after 50, the drama factor is at a high, and with people... An intense person isnt always bad news they can be incredibly loyal and driven unfortunately, it means know. Same way too stressful for you you tend to be clingy with your favorite people even if looking..., fervent, frenzied, vehement, and drama, its not worth their time resolve get! Facebook or Instagram friends when they dont really know them whole personality feels more aggressive to them, soothe calm!
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